Infinity is a loop

I wanna
wake up and do what I wanna do.
I wanna, I wanna
Wear my finest and walk down the streets freely and be admired and not touched.
Let loose, move my body, and not be afraid of what it can do, blur out the eyes that’ll watch me do.

I wanna, I wanna, I wanna
fall in love safely,
build a life with someone who won’t be afraid to let me roam the earth freely.
Grow through days, months, years and decades with a lover who won’t be afraid to feel me deeply.
Run barefoot through an endless meadow and have someone to collide with me in a loving embrace— that leave me seeing the world spinning.

I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna
know all the people I will lose—
friends, family & foes.
Know if it’ll hurt just the same as I get older, will I ever get use to it?
Who will come and replace or will they leave voids?
Will it all heal in the end?

I wanna
know if I can keep my mother and get to choose a better father?
if the oldest daughter gets a break someday?
if you’ll know safety, if you’ll know what freedom feels like.

I wanna
become and become and it doesn’t threaten you.
Grow some wings so I can give you the proper hug.
Choose to keep you by my side instead of racking through my memory bank for you.
Hold your face in my hands and look you deep in the eye—
tell you that I’ll never let you go.

I wanna grow old
I wanna look back and smile
I wanna have no regrets
I wanna have permanent lines of all the smiles and laughs of my lifetime
I wanna choose to be you in every life.

I wanna
know where do we go and if I get to choose.
If I get to stroke her hair one last time.
If I get to cradle her first.
Will you be the exact version of me?

I wanna, I wanna,
know if you’ll be somebody’s everything.
If you’ll be so treasured that they’ll be afraid to lose you.

I wanna know if I get to go back to the beginning
and cradle you for the first time cause it’ll be the last time
because I know you’ll have to figure it out alone.